July 30, 2009

Another day goes by without you... Everytime I hear or read that someone is pregnant I find myself feeling sad. I remember after I first had Benny, I would pray at night for the several friends I had at the time having fertility issues. Now I pray for me. I pray for you. I think about you throughout the day and wonder. Oh do I wonder.... Will I ever know you? I had this crazy thought today about getting a puppy. Getting a puppy would have been the last thing on my mind this time last week, however things change as you know. I find myself needing something to keep me together and to distract all of us from the pain we are feeling. Maybe something soft and sweet is just what we need right now. I know it will never replace you or take away the hurt or loss, but isnt it okay to want to have something to look forward to right now something we can hold and see as a symbol of hope. I miss you so. Its almost been a week.